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THE BIRTH

IMG_0669-2Now that our son, Sky, is 12 days old, and I am slowly, but surely, recovering, I want to share a little about the birth. Although it is such an intimate subject that most people don’t care to know the details of, I feel it is such an amazing process of nature, that, a little of which, just has to be shared.
When most of us think about birth, we think of images we have seen in movies of women screaming in fear and agony with their legs up in stirrups as medical professionals take charge of delivering their babies. After 9 months of watching how this body knows perfectly well how to create a fully formed human baby, then when it comes to the birth, it is as if we don’t trust nature to know how to do it anymore. We fear the unknown, and when we hear of other people’s birth horror stories, and we are told of all the terrible things that could go wrong, this just makes us even more fearful. And in fear, our muscles contract and resist the whole natural process. Birthing, like Life, is about letting go, losing control, not understanding, not relying on logic or thinking. It is simply about following and trusting whatever this body needs to feel, express and do. And this is obviously absolutely unique for each individual body.
For me and Sky, it was one of the most powerfully ‘high’, and at the same time the most earthy, bodily experiences, I have known. No matter what ideas or plans Robert and I may have had about how it would or should go, in the end, it was just about following the body and falling into absolute trust with this experience now, now, now… It was amazing how the body knew exactly what to do in each moment. It was such a letting go of convention, politeness, and social decorum, and simply a surrender to the innate wisdom of animal nature. Funnily enough, as much as the thinking may have liked to imagine a serene quiet labour and birth, (having watched several birth videos where the women just quietly breathed through the labour), I found that in my experience this body needed to make loud roaring sounds as an expression of the intense energy that flowed with each surge of the womb. Feeling my body opening and opening, and then my baby moving downwards, and only letting go to this. There was no fear, and nothing in me called these sensations painful. In fact there was not a lot of commenting on, or labeling these sensations at all. Although I felt a sense of spacious euphoria throughout, this was no escape from very much feeling the strong intensity of each wave of energy as Life birthed itself. As much as Robert was with me all the way, making loud roaring sounds alongside me, and our wonderful midwife was there with her own encouraging sounds and gentle touches, I knew without doubt that, it was not up to me, or anyone else to do anything. I was alone with my baby, as Life took us on this amazing journey together. I felt the very raw animal nature of this female body, doing exactly what she was made to do. It was messy, it was noisy, it was intense, but it was so incredibly alive and real.
After Sky was born, and I held him in my arms, all I can say was that I was mind-blown! Looking at Robert with tears streaming down his face, together we fell in love with this sweet little creature that came from nowhere.

~ Unmani

 

SLOWING DOWN

 As most of you already know, I am now about 7 months pregnant. Over the next few months, I am taking some time to slow down, and just be with what is happening with my body, our baby, and our beautiful little family.

Although I won’t be traveling or holding more meetings or intensives until August, I am offering a limited number of online private sessions until mid April. If you would like to arrange these, please see: https://www.die-to-love.com/wp/dive-in/online-private-sessions/
I will also be continuing with our Monthly Themed Webinars as long as it feels good to do.
During these ‘slow’ few months, Robert, will continue to post here on Facebook,Youtube, and our website. And Nicola, my assistant, will continue to respond to emails at: admin@die-to-love.com
Love Unmani

REAL INTELLIGENCE

Just feeling into the baby growing inside my belly… He doesn’t know that he is a baby. He doesn’t know that he is a boy. He doesn’t know that he is a human. He doesn’t know what time it is. He doesn’t know which country we are in. He doesn’t know that he is someone. He is just wide open intelligence (and he doesn’t even understand what those words mean). The intelligence that he is, doesn’t need to understand any of those concepts, because it is Life itself – so much more than concepts.
And of course the funny thing is that, although we all start like that, in our mother’s womb knowing nothing about anything, really nothing changes when we grow up. Even when we think we know everything about who we are and how to live this life, our true nature is still that same wide open intelligence, that doesn’t know in thinking, but knows as Life itself.
~ Unmani

LOVE AND RELATIONSHIPS

We long to be truly met, and to merge with the other. We long to be seen as the Love that we really are, and to lose ourselves completely in that, all the while knowing that it is safe, and that the other will love us unconditionally no matter what we do, say or feel. However, in most human relationships, we live in fear more than the Love we really are. We have been hurt before, so we protect ourselves. We hold back and do not give everything that we would so love to receive. We assume that it is not safe to let down our boundaries, so we play power games where winning provides an illusion of safety. We wait for the other to provide safety (and blame them if they don’t), before we risk opening up. It is a painful roller-coaster of highs and lows, of getting temporary experiences of love, and then losing them…
What you really long for, has to start with yourself. You can not wait for the other to open up. You can not forever point the finger at the other, and avoid looking at yourself. You have to courageously take the first step to let down the walls of protection. You have to risk losing the power games, and even risk losing the relationship. It is the only way to meet, and be met, in the Love that you truly are.
~ Unmani